A fast one

The Nanny State marches on:

A proposal that would place at least a one-year moratorium on new fast-food restaurants in a broad swath of neighborhoods, mostly in South Los Angeles, won unanimous support from a Los Angeles City Council committee Tuesday.

If approved by the full council and signed by the mayor, the law would prevent fast-food chains from opening new restaurants in a 32-square-mile area, including West Adams, Baldwin Village and Leimert Park. The moratorium would be in effect for one year, with the possibility of two six-month extensions.

The measure, proposed by Councilwoman Jan Perry, whose 9th District includes much of South Los Angeles, defines a fast-food restaurant as “any establishment which dispenses food for consumption on or off the premises, and which has the following characteristics: a limited menu, items prepared in advance or prepared or heated quickly, no table orders and food served in disposable wrapping or containers.”

Restaurant lobbyists were initially against this idea, but the story says they’re now working with the council and are waiting to see how they define “fast food.” Hey, if the government can be used to be rid of some of the competition, that’s what capitalism is about, right?

War wounds

Here’s a first. I find myself agreeing with part of a Dan Carpenter column:

Knowing there’s little risk of ruining that going concern, mayors and other elected officials nevertheless join with business leaders, clergy, sports figures and such to declare war on crime once and for all, as if it might form itself into a single giant Satanic entity that could be driven out of town by combined moral force. Or perhaps a hill to be taken by the Marines.

As we have seen to our continuing horror in recent weeks, the violence strikes where it’s going to strike, heedless of speeches and prayers, fearless of bold new policing strategies. Common decency and common sense have less effect on the phenomenon than cold weather.

But then he blames the usual suspects. More police would help, but taxpayers are too stingy to pay for them. “Less availability of guns” is a nice idea, but that would mean testing “the gun lobby.” Not that more cops or fewer weapons would have “a profound effect” on crime, but they would make “a strronger statement than the commendable tub token gestures our leaders painfully execute these days.” The residents of high-crime areas can be exhorted to “rise up and say no” to the thugs, but who can blame them if they decline to take that risk?

But authorities and residents can and do work together to make neighborhoods safer. Evil can’t be stopped, but it can be made to feel unwelcome. That’s not a “war” on crime, just one battle at a time.

Facing hard time

If you spot Dustin Smith, 27, who escaped from the Edinburgh Correctional Facility, be sure to call authorities. You can’t miss him, really:

Smith, a 5-foot, 9-inch white male with a shaved head and brown eyes, has facial tattoos that make his appearance distinctive. According to a release, he has a “tribal design” on the left side of his face and forehead. He also has a tribal tattoo on the back of his head.

My guess — and it is only a guess, mind you — is that someone who gets tattoos on his face has pretty much decided he doesn’t care to fit into mainstream society. What do you think?

Hell’s waiting

This week’s nominees for the Eighth Circle of Hell (the Seventh is for the merely violent):

Indianapolis police have received reports that one or more people have been going door to door in Indianapolis soliciting money for an injured officer.

Lt. Jeff Duhamell, Indianapolis Metropolitan Police Department spokesman, said Sunday that police had taken several calls during the weekend from residents reporting such solicitations. He said IMPD has not endorsed any such collection and advised residents to call police.

IMPD Patrolman Jason A. Fishburn, 29, was shot in the head July 10 while chasing a man subsequently charged in connection with three recent homicides. He remains in critical condition at Wishard Memorial Hospital.

Give money to people and causes you select. Don’t trust people who just show up at your door.

(I myself belong in Level 6 — the City of Dis — reserved for heretics, according to the Dante’s Inferno Test, although Levels 2 and 3, for the lustful and gluttonous, were apparently tied for a close second. Test yourself, if you dare.)

Melongolly

OK, God works in mysterious ways, but a bullet-proof watermelon?

Police later showed Thompson the path the bullet took through her car. She now believes that path was guided by God.

“Came through the door, hit her, then it went to the Bible,” she said. The Bible was sitting on the seat between the two girls. “It went in here and come out here and it shredded my Sunday School book. The word of God slowed the bullet so that it didn’t kill anybody.”

A watermelon Jaelyn was holding in her lap eventually stopped the bullet.

“Right in the watermelon. Didn’t come out of the watermelon,” Thompson said. “The word of God and the Lord’s power saved. He sent the bullet into the watermelon.”

She said that both her granddaughters are OK and that eventually Shyann’s bullet wound would heal.

I’m all for milking a good story, but come on: This account doesn’t even bother to mention that the gun battle sending stray bullets in the car also resulted in the death of one Jeffrey Taylor, shot in the back. How come God didn’t show up with two watermelons?

Good news for the lottery

Mob enforcers Police officials quickly muscle out the competition do their duty to keep a high moral standard in the state:

Officials have shut down a central Indiana business where they suspect patrons were illegally playing poker for money.

The Indiana Gaming Control Division served a search warrant Wednesday night at the Hold ‘Em House in Tipton about 30 miles north of Indianapolis.

They suspected poker was being played. At a place called the Hold ‘Em House. Geniuses.

No favors, please

Feel free to insert your own doughnut joke:

A police lieutenant in Daytona Beach was fired over accusations that he threatened slower emergency response times if he was not given complimentary specialty Starbucks coffee drinks.

An internal police investigation found that Daytona Lt. Major Garvin received free coffee for about two years from a city Starbucks coffee store.

However, when recently denied free coffee from new management, Garvin allegedly told managers that he could change the police department’s response time if they refuse to give him complimentary drinks.

 

Garvin is accused of saying, “If something happens, either we can respond really fast or we could respond really slow. I’ve been coming here for years and I’ve been getting whatever I want. I’m the difference between you getting a two-minute response time, if you needed a little help, or a 15 minutes response time.”

Policies against accepting favors can seem awfully petty sometimes.  Such policies at newspapers can be as rigid as the ones on police departments, and I’ve heard a lot of reporters grumble about them over the years. What’s the problem with letting someone pay for you meal, for Pete’s sake, or buying you a drink? The problem (other than the appearance of impropriety, which can be as deadly as the real thing) is that, in the absence of a blanket policy, someone has to figure out where the line is — when inconsequential niceties turn into attempts to curry favor. And while that’s being studied, there will some like this officer who have decided that they are owed the favors.

Problem solved

Well, it’s a start:

A company that owns 11 McDonald’s restaurants in Nevada was fined one million dollars Wednesday after pleading guilty to employing 58 illegal immigrants.

No work, no incentive to come here illegally. Make it a lot more companies and a few billion in fines, and there will be no more illegal-immigration crisis.

Judging the judge

Anybody have any sympathy for Judge Kenneth Scheibenberger, who now faces formal charges of judicial misconduct before the Indiana Supreme Court? I have some:

On November 30, 2007, Judge Scheibenberger suspended his court session and proceeded to the courtroom of Judge Frances C. Gull, Allen Superior Court, for the purpose of observing a sentencing hearing of a defendant in Judge Gull’s court. Judge Scheibenberger sat in the gallery wearing his judicial robe while the man was sentenced for a weapons violation.

As the sentencing hearing concluded, Judge Scheibenberger moved to the front of the courtroom, approached the deputy prosecutor, and created a disturbance during which he told the deputy prosecutor that the defendant was a drug dealer and declared, “Upstanding citizen, my ass!” in reference to a comment he heard during the sentencing. Judge Scheibenberger then turned to the man’s parents, who were seated in the front row. He said to them, “Are you related to that piece of shit? Upstanding citizen, my ass! He’ll get his!” or words to that effect.

Judges perhaps more than any other professionals are supposed to leave their personal lives at the door. They’re charged with maintaining the dignity of the court and its neutrality. They’re supposed to be impartial, logical and free of passion. When we think of actually getting justice from the criminal justice system, we look first to the judges. So the Indiana Commission on Judicial Qualifications can’t be faulted for taking the actions it did.

But Scheibenberger let his grief as a parent overwhelm his judicial sensibilities. He believed the man had dealt drugs to his son, Sam, who died in August. A few years ago, he got an admonition from the commission because he got into his son’s file on a misdemeanor arrest and delayed the case, a clear use of judicial power for personal interest.

I’m not saying the Supreme Court should be lenient with the judge, or even arguing about how good a judge he has or has not been. It’s just easy to understand what anguish the family has been going through over their son.

Good gun control

Marion County Prosecutor Carl Brizzi vows to get tough on gun crimes with something called Project EVICT:

More than a decade ago, the federal government initiated a program called Project Exile. The premise of the program was that an offender gave up his “right” to remain in his community if he used a gun during the commission of a crime. The defendant was punished with a sentence of hard time, typically five years. To make the punishment worse, the offender was shipped far away from his home, his family and his friends.

Project EVICT would effect the same punishment by sending those arrested and convicted of gun crimes in Marion County to the New Castle Correctional Facility. More than 400 beds are available in a mix of minimum- and maximum-security settings. Taking these offenders 40 miles from home breaks up potential networking opportunities, makes family visitation more difficult and sends home the message that gun crime isn’t just illegal, it is intolerable.

Adding to the effectiveness would be mandatory sentences that increase in severity, say, five years for the first gun crime, 10 for the second, life for the third. But at least this is “gun control” that goes after the thugs instead of the people who have to defend themselves against the thugs.

No dignity required

Susan Atkins is dying of brain cancer and wanted a “compassionate release” from her life prison sentence so she could “die with digity,” surrounded by family and friends instead of prison guards. Yes, that Susan Atkins:

Atkins was the one who stabbed Tate to death, saying she killed her to silence the actress’s pleas to spare her unborn baby. After the slaying, Atkins tasted Tate’s blood and used it to write the word “Pig” on the victim’s door. She claimed she was on LSD at the time of the murders, but did not apologize until a parole hearing years later.

She’s been alive almost 40 years longer than she should have been, and she’s fine right where she is. The parole board was smart enough to deny the request — which wasn’t not a sure thing, since this is California we’re talking about.

This is reasonable?

The weasels in D.C. government are responding to the Supreme Court’s Heller decision with proposed rules showing they truly do not get it:

Here’s what they’re proposing:

• Allowing an exception for handgun ownership for self-defense use inside the home.
• If you want to keep a handgun in your home, the MPD will have to perform ballistic testing on it before it can be legally registered.
• There will be a limit to one handgun per person for the first 90 days after the legislation becomes law.
• Firearms in the home must be stored unloaded and disassembled, and secured with either a trigger lock, gun safe, or similar device. The new law will allow an exception for a firearm while it is being used against an intruder in the home.
• Residents who legally register handguns in the District will not be required to have licenses to carry them inside their own homes.

How grateful D.C.’s citizens must be. They will be allowed to use a handgun — one that’s been taken to the police for ballistic testing, of course — against an intruder in the home, after they’ve taken it from the gun safe, assembled it and loaded it. Sure hope there are some slow intruders in the nation’s capital.

Off the bus

Well, this is interesting. “Shortbus” is an unrated film with sexually explicit scenes. It’s the kind of movie some would call obscene and some would not. In 1973, the Supreme Court more or less gave up on obscenity and decided it should be based on what an “average person” would consider “community standards.”

The movie came up in Fort Wayne two years ago when a man complained about the Allen County Public Library having a copy. The library decided to keep the copy and defended its decision. Now a patron of the Bloomington library has complained about the movie, and the result was different:

Bloomington Public Library patrons looking to rent the movie “Shortbus” on DVD won’t find it on the shelves.

A customer complained the movie was pornographic and a library committee decided to remove it.

I wouldn’t have guessed that the “City of Churches” would have the more tolerant standard. And I doubt if the Supreme Court realized it could be library directors rather than county preosecutors determining what communities’ standards are.

Quiet time

For the “things are not always what they seem” file:

A report of a family fight Wednesday afternoon in New Castle didn’t turn out to be what police expected.

A nine-year-old girl called 911 after she awoke from a nap and heard her mother screaming. She went to her mother’s bedroom and thought her mother was being attacked.

Turns out, her parents were just enjoying marital relations.

Ah, a screamer. But if this little girl is 9, and this is the first time she’s heard this . . . just sayin’. Bet it will be quiet in that house for quite some time now.

The discount rate

If you’re just an average motorist who lets a couple of traffic citations pile up, the authorities would  hound you to death. But if you’re a railroad that racks up more than 1,500 tickets for blocking city streets, that’s a different story:

Until Tuesday, 1,551 tickets issued to Norfolk Southern since at least 2004 had remained unprosecuted by the Lake County prosecutor’s office.
[. . .]

The railroad initially had faced more than $850,000 in penalties, but on Tuesday wrote one check for $50,000 to cover the two settlements, which are still subject to the court’s approval.

That’s about 6 percent. If the rest of us had to do only 6 percent of the time (or fine) for doing the crime, it’d be quite a different world, wouldn’t it?

The gun, unjumped

And this year’s Sam Sheppard Award for jumping to the wrong conclusion goes jointly to the media (especially electronic) and the prosecution for:

New DNA evidence does not match any family members to the death of JonBenet Ramsey, according to the Boulder County District Attorney.

 Colorado TV station KUSA reported the announcement Wednesday afternoon. The Denver station also reported that the newly discovered evidence does not match anyone in the law enforcement database to the slaying.

[. . .]

KUSA-TV reported that Lacy met with John Ramsey and his defense attorneys on Wednesday morning to formally deliver the letter clearing the family.

 ”We intend in the future to treat you as the victims of this crime, with the sympathy due you because of the horrific loss you suffered,” the letter states.

Oh, sure, no problem. Everybody makes mistakes. Think nothing of it. At least now they can look for the real killer. Probably that one-armed guy.

I confess to having several conversations with friends and family in which most of us thought the Ramseys probably had something to do with the death, all that stuff about “presumed innocent” aside. I think it had something to do with how creepy we all thought the kiddie beauty pageant stuff was.

The law cracks down

Via Hit & Run, here is a helpful Detroit Free Press graphic explaining Flint’s new law against saggy pants. That ought to kick the crime problem in the butt. Niney-three days to a year in jail and/or up to $500 in fines — zowie, that’s a serious law.

Phone sex

Criminal genius of the week:

The victim of a brutal rape in Somerville was able to convince her dim-witted alleged attacker to give her his phone number, which police then used to identify the thug, law enforcement sources told the Herald yesterday.

Somerville police Chief Anthony Holloway said the assault victim gave officers “crucial” information leading to the arrest of Michael K. Mahoney, who was charged yesterday with beating and raping the woman. But Holloway offered no further details.

“Oh, that was good. Give me your number so I can call you.” She likes me, she really likes me! He should be careful in prison. They’ll get his number, too.

Bad dogs

How often do we have to point out that whenever there is a bad dog, there is most likely a bad owner? This clown wants the officer punished and the city to pay his vet bill:

When Elwood reserve officer Gary Cole arrived, he said the dog jumped on his police car, and charged at him.

 ”I was scared. You got an animal charging at you, you don’t have a lot of time to think,” Cole said. “He wasn’t there to shake my hand. He was barking with teeth showing.”

 Cole fired at the dog, striking it in the ear, he said. He then put the dog back inside the home.

 Mickle was cited for having a public nuisance, having a vicious dog and failing to restrain his pet. He plead not guilty to the charges, but told Thomas he wants Cole punished, and for the city to pay the $330 veterinarian bill.

 ”He didn’t have to shoot the dog to corral it,” Mickle said. “He’s a dog catcher. That’s not the first way to do things, to just shoot the dog. They got nooses, tranquilizers and all other stuff.”

Yeah, call for the nooses and tranquilizers  while the dog is charging with teeth bared. Sounds reasonable, does’t it?

This is really annoying

This story caught my eye last week, and I was going to comment about it but forgot:

SYDNEY, Australia —  New regulations making it a crime to annoy or inconvenience people gathering in Sydney during Pope Benedict XVI’s visit later this month were criticized Tuesday as a heavy-handed blow to free speech.

The laws will apply in dozens of areas of downtown Sydney — including the city’s landmark opera house, train stations and city parks — that are designated venues for World Youth Day, a Catholic evangelical festival at which the pontiff will conduct mass and lead prayer meetings.

The regulations give police and emergency services workers power to order anyone to stop behavior that “causes annoyance or inconvenience to participants in a World Youth Day event,” according to a New South Wales state government gazette. Anyone who does not comply faces a 5,500 Australian dollar (US$5,300) fine.

It would be easy to make light of this dumheadedness — just think of all the annoying people we’d like to ban. But it’s the kind of approach that’s becoming all too frequent in the law – making something punishable that is very open to subjective interpretation. Who is to say what is annoying except the person who says he is being annoyed? Remember our own country’s approach to “sexual harassment” in the workplace? Too often it has been defined as whatever the accusing person feels harassed by — there are no objective standards. Without such standards, the law becomes a weapon instead of our protector.

Bang. Bang. Bang. Bang. Bang. Bang.

Hey, Pard, hold ’er up there. Better drop that sidearm off at the sheriff’s office afore you go to the saloon. We got us a no-gun zone here. Oh, it’s just a plain old six-shooter? Never mind, then.

WASHINGTON —  The Supreme Court’s repeal of the ban on handguns in Washington, D.C., may be a boon for a segment of the firearms industry whose last major windfall might have been in the heyday of the Dirty Harry movies: those who make and sell revolvers.

 The court ruled that a blanket ban on handguns is unconstitutional, but D.C. Mayor Adrian Fenty and other Washington officials want to keep in place a prohibition on semiautomatic handguns — those in which a bullet clip is inserted into the gun’s grip.

Such a ban would continue to outlaw 9-mm and other popular pistols that are legal in most other places around the United States. And it would make the classic six-shooter the only legal handgun in the District.

Just won’t give up, will they? Oh, well, I’d still take that matchup. Revolvers feel better in my hand, more natural and comfortable. But I shoot better with the semiautomatics. The point is, though, that I need not be defenseless when someone wants to do me harm. Gun-control zealots are obsessed with rate of fire, but I don’t have to be all that fast. Just readier than the thug thinks I am.

Sanity returning by degrees

What? No cut-rate college education for illegal immigrants? Goodness — if we aren’t careful, they might start getting the idea they aren’t supposed to be here:

Some states are making it harder for illegal immigrants to attend college by denying in-state tuition benefits or banning undocumented students.

In the past two years, Arizona, Colorado, Georgia and Oklahoma have refused in-state tuition benefits to students who entered the USA illegally with their parents but grew up and went to school in the state. That represents a reversal from earlier this decade, when 10 states passed laws allowing in-state rates for such students.

And believe it or not, some universities are even kicking the illegal immigrants out altogether. The humanity!

Legal doesn’t mean smart

I’ve frequently posted about dumb laws. Here’s a Web site devoted entirely to that subject. Just a quick scan of the opening page gave me this favorite:

I  just received this email from a staffer in the U.S. Senate:

“On Monday, the Senate passed a resolution honoring soil. That’s right. Soil. I mean, isn’t soil happy to let its accomplishments speak for themselves? Sustaining life, surviving for millions of years, etc. Does it really need a nonbinding resolution to make it feel important? Seems if we were going to do something for soil we ought to at least give it a Congressional Gold Medal or something. The first sentence says it recognizes soil as an essential natural resource. I have always wondered whether soil is an essential natural resource, and now I know. The Senate has spoken.”

Somewhere in there must be some of Indiana’s dumb laws. My current favorite legislative dumbness (now that we’ve dumped the “buy illegal fireworks here but promise to take them out of state before using them” law) is the fact that driving without a seat belt is illegal but riding a motorcycle without a helmet is not.

Smoke ‘em if you got ‘em

Scenes from a world gone mad

Coughing and spluttering resonated around Tweede Kamer coffeeshop in Amsterdam yesterday as customers got to grips with new Dutch smoking regulations that prohibit tobacco but not marijuana.

“They’re having to smoke pure weed now and they’re not used to it,” Frank, working behind the counter, said. “That’s why there’s all this coughing. It’s going to be quite tricky.”

[. . .]

Jurists added that the 750 or so licensed Dutch coffeeshops could continue to stock and sell a maximum of 500 grams of cannabis, and their customers could continue to smoke it on the premises so long as it is not mixed with tobacco.

I remember from my younger days when, I um, traveled with a certain crowd, some of them (I don’t remember their names, honest) would hide their weed in filter cigarettes. You carefeully remove the tobacco, see, replace it with marijuana, then put a little of the tobbaco back in at the end. This technique should be even easier for hiding tobacco in a joint, since it is much finer and looser than marijuana. And the smells should mingle so much that the tobacco smoke will be quite undetectable. Just think of the bonus for those around the smokers: Sure, they get that evil secondhand smoke, but, with the contact high, they won”t mind so much.
(Hat tip to Nancy Nall) 

People love fireworks

Hoosier Hooligans, happily corrupting hapless Illinois hicks:

To shoot fireworks legally, a person must attend training at a local fire department and pass a safety and knowledge test. They must also apply for a site inspection by the fire department and apply for a permit issued by their local government.

William Weimer, vice president of Phantom Fireworks, said people from Illinois will continue to get fireworks in Indiana despite what the law says.

“People love fireworks,” Weimer said. “If they can’t get them legally, they will get them illegally.”

There is an obvious solution. We just need to make those buying fireworks here sign a pledge promising not to take the them out of state to set them off.